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Child Abuse, Past, Present and Future

In 1873, Etta Wheeler, a nurse was making rounds in a tenement, in New York City. She had heard stories about a girl who was being held hostage and abused by her foster family. After talking her way into the apartment, she caught her first glimpse of nine year old Mary Ellen.

The child was barefoot, half clothed and half starved. A cat of nine tails lay nearby, and her arms and legs showed the effects of its use. Her face bore the look of suppression and misery. Over the next two months, Mrs. Wheeler reported the child’s plight to police and charities trying to save her, nothing was done. As there were no laws to protect children, no laws were being broken.

She contacted Henry Bergh, the president of the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals, which had been started nine years earlier. Bergh convinced a judge to allow the society to intervene.

“I saw the child brought in wrapped in a horse blanket, at the sight of which men wept aloud.” Jacob Riis said.

Mary Ellen’s body was one large bruise, and her face wore scares and slashes caused by her foster mother’s scissors. Using the only tools available, which were laws placed on the books, to protect animals, they saved Mary Ellen. This was the first case of removal, and New York City was the first to establish a child protective agency.

Mrs. Wheeler and the suffragettes then went on a campaign against child abuse. Their programs were rooted in prejudice as most were women of wealth and privilege. However misguided their efforts, something was being done.

Throughout history, children have been viewed as property or as possessions. In many cases, people had as many children as possible. To provide the free labor needed to run the farm of business. Up until the Civil War children were being used as slave labor throughout the world. While slaves had some rights and were considered valuable for their monetary worth, children held no such value. A war was fought in this country, to end slavery, as children worked in factories and died every day from starvation and worse.

If you became an orphan before the Civil War and for some time after, your chances of living to be old enough to escape the orphanage were slim. After the Civil War children were taken from families at an alarming rate. To be placed in foster care or an orphanage, at that time, was akin to being placed in prison. The entire affair was a good old boy system which further victimized those placed into it. Since most of those being taken were children from the poor, immigrant neighborhoods, no one cared.

Then child abuse advocacy faded again. Throughout World War I, the depression and World War II, it was ignored. The family needed to be a strong, sacred institution so children took one for the country.

Child abuse advocacy mirrors, social revolution, and as it had begun during the years following the abolishment of slavery, it resurfaced during the Civil Rights movement. In the early sixties, laws were passed requiring doctors and teachers to report suspected child abuse. It was during this time it was discovered X-rays could clearly distinguish between normal broken bones and those broken during abuse. For the first time, child abuse could be proven.

With the freedom of the Cultural Revolution, sexual abuse was discussed for the first time. Studies determined that all forms of abuse ran across our entire society, crossing all cultural, economic and sociological boundaries. Abuse was no longer believed to afflict only the poor, which was never true.

What followed was a veritable witch hunt. For years, allegations of abuse destroyed children and parents alike. While much was accomplished, many innocents were persecuted. Many lived in fear of a system, still rife with better than thou people. Children and adults, mostly from the lower classes feared and loathed it. We are still dealing with the backlash of that witch hunt today.

Last year there were three million reported cases of abuse in our country. Admittedly the studies, which produce these statistics, indicate there are two unreported to each reported case. That means nine million cases in America last year. Of those, only nine percent resulted in charges. Out of that nine percent, only nine percent resulted in a conviction. There are five children beaten to death in our country, each day at the hands of those they know, love and trust. Their average age is three years old.

The child protection service agencies have now become reactionary entities. So many laws were placed into effect, after the witch hunts. In many cases, their hands are now tangled in red tape. By the time a child can be removed, many times that child is damaged beyond repair. They will visit the horrors they endured upon another generation of innocent children.

The thousands of Social Workers and Foster Parents are not at fault. They are far outnumbered and poorly supported. These jobs are the hardest on the earth and those who do them are unsung heroes.

Foster Parents must give of their hearts freely, to children who have no idea what a heart is and place no value on the gift. The Foster Parents I’ve talked to, assure me one child who becomes a productive, loving person, is worth the hundreds of broken hearts and spent tears they endure.

Now for the question I am asked repeatedly. What can be done about child abuse? Clearly our current system does not work. Greater minds than mine have worked on this problem for the last century. Yet the statistics grow. Frustrated, the majority of our population continues to turn a blind eye. They ignore the numbers which continue to grow despite the educated, enlightened nature of our country and the world.

When a thing hurts too much, it’s easy to look away. I deal with this daily; advocates against child abuse are not popular and spend much of their time speaking to smiling, agreeing people who will never speak to them again. Many of us who were abused have inherent flaws, which prevent us from being Foster Parents or adopting. In many cases, the educated, have no experience and look down on those who do. They forsake the help of those who have a better understanding and a vested interest in stopping this epidemic. I say again, beware the self righteousness of the right. It’s easy to pass judgment on children when you have no clue what they are going through.

Now for the answer, if there is one. In some societies, children are trained to hate beginning at their earliest moments. I am in no way suggesting such a course of action. However, to put an end to such hate requires wiping the slate clean.

What I mean to say is, in order to decrease the massive amounts of abuse; the change needs to start with the young. First a few words of caution. Already the country believes that a child must simply cry wolf to condemn their parents. I am told often that we have lost control of our children, because we can no longer punish them. Furthermore, they are disrespectful and lazy. Again, excuses to stand by, and allow what is happening, to continue. However, to some extent this is true and another indicator that our system is failing. If you don’t know the difference between discipline and beating a three year old to death, write me, I’ll explain it.

We cannot legislate this out of our society. We may jail as many as we like, but until all Americans understand, to our core, that children are not possessions or property there will be no change. Parenting classes given to adults will not make this go away. This change must start with our children. We need to develop a curriculum that can be taught, beginning in the first grade and continued throughout their education. One which makes it totally unacceptable to hurt a child under any circumstances.

The program D.A.R.E works on this principle, and it has made a difference. Now even smoking cigarettes has become deplorable in the eyes of many children. We need child abuse to become repulsive to all people, before they reach adulthood. Even if we take such measures, it may take up to three generations for this program, to make a difference. The monetary cost might be great, but our jails are full of the abused and our homes are full of the unhappy. Make no mistake we are paying heavily for what we do to our children. We must break the cycle, and it will require all of us to do it. Just because, abuse did not touch your household, does not mean that someone you love will not be abused, assaulted or otherwise victimized by someone who was abused. Now, for my question to you. Why does our society continue to become more violent? Nine million cases of abuse each year, HELLO.

We need to gather together people with the education and determination to make those in our government, who can make a difference, make one. Please feel free to contact me and point out how wrong I am, or to put petty differences aside and change the world for our children.
Kennesaw Taylor. com

Alicia Oakley Howard

12:47 pm on Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Thank you for submitting this article. I am the Walton Co. advocate coordinator for Alcovy CASA, a nonprofit that recruits, trains, and supports community volunteers who advocate on behalf of abused and neglected children in our community through the juvenile court. We are in desperate need of volunteers, as we are currently serving 67 children with only 15 CASA volunteers. If you or anyone you know is interested in being the voice of a Child, please call us at 770-385-7450.

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Kennesaw Taylor

1:23 pm on Wednesday, April 4, 2012

I can't believe i did not mention CASA. They are true heroes. Thank you Alicia for what you do.

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Cheryl Miller

5:02 pm on Wednesday, April 4, 2012

We need child abuse to become repulsive to all people? Isn't it already? The story you tell is horrible, but what is the answer? I've read that taking children away from their family is almost as bad psychologically in homes where abuse has taken place. Someone very close to me was placed in foster care after being abused and strugggled her entire life. She died of an overdose at 43. There was nothing that could be done that we didn't try to get through to her, but I guess the pain of her past was too much. My heart goes out to these children. Thank you for bringing awareness to this issue and I hope those who can volunteer time to help will consider doing so. Our kids are so precious and so vulnerable. It should be on everyone's shoulders to try and protect them.

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Crystal Huskey

9:09 pm on Wednesday, April 4, 2012

With child abuse as prevalent as it is, it must not be that repulsive to everyone. People who were raised in abusive homes often see it as "normal" and continue the cycle.

Kennesaw Taylor

7:15 am on Thursday, April 5, 2012

Great answer Crystal.
Indeed, if it were repulsive to everyone there would be no problem. I certainly do not advocate removal. However, if there were some magic way to determine the identities of the five who will die each day, I would personally remove them. Since writing my book I have received thousands of letters. The suicide letters are the worst and always come late in the night. I wake up, prepare my first cup of coffee and as i drink it i learn another survivor wants to die. So far, only one has actually done it and only a few have tried. This is not an easy job. In all those letters, one thing I have learned is. Most grow up thinking the abuse is normal, on top of that they suppress much of it. Many raise their children and do not understand that they have continued the cycle until they witness their children abusing their grandchildren. I believe that children should understand abuse at an early age, it's then that the strongest impressions are made. Education is the answer. I'm not suggesting kids turn on their parents, but that they simply recognize abuse and set their minds against it early.
Studies say that 47% of American adults were abused as children, to make a difference this number must change. It will take time for that to happen. Last but not least. Studies say that 100% of people on death row were abused and 82% of those in our prison system for violent crimes were abused. We must do something and it will take all of us. Okay writing another post now.

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