Wednesday's Woman: Melodie Snell Conner

(Editor's Note: This article was originally published October 26, 2011.)

Melodie Snell Conner sees people on their worst days.

The jury gives its verdict, Conner imposes a sentence, the gavel goes down, and it's decided. Some people get to go home; some people get a new home -- prison. 

Conner, who turned 50 in July, is a Superior Court judge in Gwinnett County. She's the county's first female in the position. Presiding over numerous and sometimes lengthy cases, Conner's life on the bench can be all-consuming.

But, this judge doesn't let it. She has too much to live for.

"Once you've had cancer, you realize every birthday is a gift," said this mother of three. "I celebrate my birthdays. I don't dread them."

Conner was diagnosed with breast cancer at 44. There was no family history of the disease, and nothing she noticed out of the ordinary. Then, she had a mammogram.

"I couldn't even find a lump, yet," she said.

The mammogram did what Conner couldn't. And, she was spared months of chemotherapy and its emotionally devastating side effects. She received a lumpectomy and radiation.

She's been cancer free for six years.

"I just consider myself blessed that they found it so early," Conner said. "I'm a huge believer in the once-a-year screening."

Despite what some studies report, Conner said women should get mammograms more than every two years. Early screening was a lifesaver for her, and she believes it is for other women, as well.

She's had two friends die from cancer, so she knows what she was up against.

"I'm just living proof of it," she said of early detection. "I'm like a walking advertisement for mammograms and early screening."

Family Ties

During the time of her cancer, this South Gwinnett High alumna said her family was exceptionally supportive. She's one of Snellville's Snells, so she had a lot of people around her.

But, it's always been that way. Her mother and father come from a big families. Growing up in Snellville, a family member was always down the street or across the street. In fact, her mother and aunt -- twins -- even married brothers.

"Only in the South probably can you find that," she says. "It was a great thing growing up in Snellville when everybody was right here."

The youngest of three siblings -- she has a brother and a sister, Conner said they'd probably remember her as the "typical baby." But, they were very close, and they still are.

Although her brother has moved to Good Hope, Ga., her sister, Melinda Snell Franklin, still lives in Snellville. A good number of the extended Snell family does, as well. The family often gets together at Lake Oconee, where her father has a lake house, Conner said.

Because family has always been important to her, spending time with her husband Keith and her three children is a must. Her oldest, 25-year-old Nick, just got married. The other two, Gracie, 13, and Jackson, 16, attend George Walton Academy in Monroe, Ga., where they are very active in band.

When she's not on the bench, Conner's very comfortable just being mom.

"That's really what keeps me sane and focused -- it's just my stress relief ," she said.

Books, too. She's a reader of all things with words, and she's not snobby about it. Whenever she can find time, she's reading this thing or the other thing. 

"I'm a voracious reader," she said. "I read junk books and fun books, all of that mind candy."

Mom's Lesson

She makes time to exercise to help keep her diabetes in check. Lately, she also been getting back into dance. (She used to be in an all-female clogging group in her 20s.) Now, though, she's the reigning champion of a local Dancing with the Stars competition hosted by the American Cancer Society.

She was doing moves that surprised even her. The week of the competition she practiced nearly every day. But for a woman whose career path and life is the epitome of strength, she buckled in tears one day.

She wanted every move to be perfection. She was convinced that she couldn't do it. And, then, she won.

"I had no preconceived notions that I was going to do well," she said, adding that the event was not about her, but all about charity.

Conner thanks her mother for that resilient, caring attitude. She died eight years ago, but she continues to be a source of inspiration of how to tackle life.

In her 30s, her mother picked up a tennis racket, and ascended gracefully in the sport.

In her 40s, her mother took up golf, and became a master at that, too. 

She owned a shoe store, she owned a hair salon -- she owned her life.

"She was always just my biggest fan and encouraged me to do anything and everything that I wanted to do ," Conner said. "I'm very grateful to her for that."

It's about doing things 110 percent and moving forward no matter what, said Conner, who has now been a judge for 18 years.

"You don't succeed at everything," she said. " You give it your best shot, and I think the Lord honors that. You just try and give it what you can."