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Former Boy Scout and Snellville Resident Recounts Sex Abuse

Antony Bordoli, now 40, shares his story of sex abuse at the hands of a troop leader in hopes others will speak out and, hopefully, find some closure.

Editor's note: the following is a letter sent by Antony Bordoli, a Snellville resident who experienced abuse by his Boy Scout troop leader in Miami, Florida. He was a member of troop #64. In his letter, he imagines what he would say to his abuser today.

Bordoli's abuse occurred in the mid-80s, from when he was 11 years old through 16. Therapy has helped him cope with the memories of the abuse and the pain caused by the disbelief of family members.

While this letter focuses on one man, the second in command scoutmaster, Bordoli was abused by more than one during his time as a Boy Scout.

His abusers have not been charged.

Warning: this story contains graphic content.

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To my abuser,

It has been 24 years since you last abused your position of authority as an assistant scoutmaster and a trusted family friend.  

You evidently prefer them young because as I turned 16 your attentions turned more to my younger brother.  When we spent the weekend at your house together I know you must have suffered being outnumbered and unable to harvest either of us except during play fights where my brother and I would wrestle with you on the bed or living room floor.

You were so scientific and smart in your approach to creating new playthings.  First you would tell us seemingly harmless off-color jokes about mutilating babies and test us to see if we would repeat them to our parents after our visit.  I must have disappointed you at first when I did exactly that.  We then knew that anything lewd that was discussed in the future was a secret and shouldn't be repeated to our parents because "they wouldn't understand and they'd take it out of context".  

Ever so slowly you worked on your victims (that other Boy Scout, the boy in your neighborhood, me and eventually my brother and that younger Boy Scout that told his parents, causing the troop to fold).  I wonder if my brother and I were the most willing to buy into your trust testing games including the slow momentum you employed when touching us in intimate ways week after week.  Were your other victims as compliant and trusting?

Not taking into account statutes of limitation on prosecution for your offenses, I, to this day, allow you to live outside of a caged society.  

Your "freedom" you owe to me and the other victims that protect you.  I can count on one hand the victims that I know of.

I can only imagine the hands that I would need to count the additional victims over the past 24 years.  During our last conversation a few years ago you said that the neighbor's son was coming over for homework help.  Are you as daring and calculating now as you were when we lived locally?  When your mother had to move in due to old age I know that that presented a speedbump for your urges.

You are a sick person and you need help.  I don't know how to help you without alerting the authorities, but by doing so you may lose your freedom, and, that, I cannot bring myself to take away from you because although what you did was wrong in the eyes of society, we carry the shame of enjoying the feelings that you made us feel under your caring, loving and trusted control.  You never forced us to do anything that you hadn't programmed us to want to take part in willingly.  

We cannot bring ourselves to hate you nor can we stop you from repeating your abuse on future generations of victims.  I could not face having to see you in a court while testifying against you.  All you would do is deny everything.  

Only upon your death will I know that you are done.

Your Loyal Abused

Antony Bordoli October 20, 2012 at 07:57 PM
I am in the process of contacting law enforcement to file this long overdue report.
Bridgett October 21, 2012 at 01:21 PM
Proud of your decision to do that, Antony. It's the right thing, as hard as it will be. Never doubt that. You're a brave man.
G. Gilbert October 22, 2012 at 06:24 AM
You will have more support than your ever dreamed. Good people will care.
Janet Noguera October 22, 2012 at 01:35 PM
I am very proud of you that you wrote this, I feel for you dearly and if you want me to to help in any way I will. it shows that so much goes on behind closed doors, its a shame children are subjected to so much.we are not aware of. Trusting these days is almost void. Children these days should be close at hand. You will be supported in this.
Diana November 08, 2012 at 01:47 PM
" I cannot bring myself to take away from you because although what you did was wrong in the eyes of society, we carry the shame of enjoying the feelings that you made us feel under your caring, loving and trusted control. You never forced us to do anything that you hadn't programmed us to want to take part in willingly" No part of me ever felt that way. I resented the way he was trying to "smoothe talk me" they way he always waited until my parents weren't near by. His attentions were never wanted or sought out. His methods of being my Dads best friend and holding that against me. Three years later when I did tell my parents they didn't believe me, they chose him. When he finally passed away I felt nothing, not sad or happy, nothing. I still feel nothing. Your right people will chose to believe him. If you ever do seek justice which I don't believe you will, it will take courage - which most victims are robbed off along with their innocence.

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